As many students get their heart broken for the first time, it becomes increasingly more important to give teenagers resources for dealing with toxic and abusive relationships, and the aftermath of those romantic endeavors.

So, here are the seven steps to dealing with a breakup. Keep in mind, this will not work for every single relationship, and everyone takes different amounts of time to deal with the end of a relationship.

STEP ONE: Realize. In a relationship, whether romantic, platonic, etc., the hardest part is almost always realizing that your partner may not have your best interests in mind.

STEP TWO: Believe it or not, this step is not breaking it off. At this point, you should reach out to friends and family to support you. When approaching the end of a relationship, especially one that may have ostracized you from your friends, family, and ultimately, life, it’s extremely important to have support from loved ones.

STEP THREE: Make sure you and other people are safe. If there’s any danger of harm to yourself, or the other people involved, whatsoever, the most important thing here is to attain professional help, whether medical or lawful, as long as it helps to get the people in the situation safe. In some cases, people may become volatile or emotionally unstable. A few places where you can get help for yourself, your partner, or any other person involved are hospitals, shelters, police stations, or help lines, such as the domestic abuse support line, (800) 799-7233, or a suicide hotline, 988, or if the situation calls for it, 911.

STEP FOUR: Make your intentions known, and then, if at all possible talk about it, before breaking the relationship apart. If you cannot do this safely, go back to step three for resources.

STEP FIVE: Spend time with friends and family, and most importantly, spend time with yourself. After a traumatic experience, it’s important to regroup and reevaluate your mental state. Right now, you are the priority, above most anything else. This does not mean to hurt others, just to put all your energy into yourself and no one else.

STEP SIX: Ice cream, The Notebook, calling your friends 24/7, snuggling in blankets, chocolate. This is peak break-up– what everyone thinks when it’s mentioned. Let out your grief and don’t be afraid of your emotions. This is different for everyone, but just let it out, your feelings are valid, and bottling them up will just make it worse.

STEP SEVEN: Two words, GLOW – UP! You are on your own, and now you have the freedom to decide what you want and who you are. Your life is your choice.